What Does Nail Biting Say About A Person?

Good question. As a long time nail biter from about age 8 – 50 when I finally quit, I never really consciously thought about what nail biting said about me as a person.

I did however wonder about what people thought about me whenever they caught me biting my nails because I know how gross it is when I see other people doing it.

It’s an odd thing: Any time I see someone putting their fingers in their mouth to bite them, I am disgusted. I think how gross it is and I watch to see what else they touch with their hands and wonder where their hands have been and how clean they are.

Of course, I bit my nails for decades and hardly gave it a thought when I did it. I generally knew when my hands were clean and wouldn’t stick my fingers in my mouth to bite my nails if I knew my hands were dirty. I can’t say the same thing about other people though…

Still, nail biting is a dirty habit and I feel more so now that I’ve finally quit.

What does nail biting say about a person?

There are at least two main ways to look at this question:

What does nail biting actually say about a person?

Over the years, researchers have posited numerous theories regarding what nail biting actually means. Many theories are now debunked but today we generally believe that people bite their nails to deal with various triggers such as stress, anxiety, boredom and things of that nature.

Some researchers further believe that nail biting involves an aspect of OCD, self harm and things of that nature that are more controversial opinions.

A new theory suggests that nail biting has an aspect of perfectionism where we get frustrated and impatient when we can’t complete a task as we would like and we deal with it by biting our nails. So this theory believes that frustration is more key to nail biting than say anxiety or stress.

Nail biting is further considered to be a body-focused repetitive behavior (BFRB) that in addition to nail biting also includes things like hair pulling, nose picking, lip and cheek biting and skin picking. Dealing with BFRBs may be handled in a variety of ways.

How do other people perceive nail biters?

This is something that I did occasionally consider when I was a nail biter but I have to admit, it’s something I think about more frequently now that I’m a reformed nail biter.

I look at other people biting their nails and think how gross it is. I have no interest to shake their hand after seeing them put their fingers in their mouth which I guess is one positive thing that has come out of the pandemic since shaking hands is now a no-no.

For me, I see nail biters – especially when I don’t know them – as gross and unattractive especially when they do it in public. Just like I used to occasionally bite my nails in public when I was a nail biter. Obviously I wasn’t quite as hard on myself when I did it…

But I think about how it made my mum feel when she saw me biting my nails as a kid. Later in life, my wife and younger daughter noticed. In all three instances, they’d get on my case and frustratingly (to each of us) tell me to stop. Over time, it had to impact what they felt about me since I refused to stop doing it.

The degree of nail biting matters

For the average nail biter, personal and long term injury isn’t necessarily something we deal with. I bit and picked my nails – particularly on my right hand – for around 40 years. 40 years where I probably had to cut or clip my fingernails a handful of times at best.

I look at my fingernails which at the time of writing this article, have not been bitten or picked in about 7 months. I can’t see any damage caused by nail biting of any kind. Not every nail biter ends up like this however.

And damage due to nail biting isn’t just centered on the fingers and nails either. The teeth and roots can be damaged as can the jaw and infections of the mouth and even stomach can result from long term and aggressive nail biting.

The more aggressively you bite your nails, the more potential damage you cause to them and the more noticeable it becomes to you and people around you. Plus your fingers can bleed and your nails can be permanently damaged when nail biting is severe.

What does nail biting mean?

At the end of the day, there is no catch all answer because every nail biter is different. What I learned over time is to be less concerned with what nail biting means in general and focus more on why you do it and what you need to do to stop.

For me, I eventually realized that I effectively didn’t want to do it anymore so I stopped. Certainly, if it was easy I’d have quit decades ago. But I think it was just my time to quit, and so I did.

If your nail biting is excessive to the point of fingers bleeding, nails extremely short and painful, skin ripped and things of that nature, you should seek medical help to get to the bottom of it. I never got to that stage which is probably part of the reason I bit my nails for so long: There was really no catalyst for me to quit until I finally made a concerted effort to do so.