While nail biting has been something humans have done since we realized we had nails to bite, doctors have only recently gotten around to doing any hard research on why we do it and the underlying causes. While we currently generally understand that nail biting may be triggered for different reasons, this can also depend on the person and circumstances.
If you bite your nails, here are questions to ask yourself to learn more about the underlying reason for this habit to figure out how to stop it.
When do you bite your nails?
I had to think about this one myself even though I’ve been biting my nails for as long as I can remember. Biting and picking my nails comes so naturally at this point, I hardly even know when I do it. I couldn’t even tell you how many times in day I do it because I’ve never written it down or kept track.
If you can focus on when you bite your nails you become more aware of the habit and may be able to prevent it next time before it happens. Many long term nail biters simply aren’t aware of how automatic it is and thus can’t prevent it from happening. If you can identify when you are about to bite your nails and pay attention to it, you might be surprised how often and naturally it occurs.
When don’t you bite your nails?
If you bite your nails at certain times only, it’s likely that you can identify many more occasions when you don’t bite them. For me, I never bite or pick my nails when I’m busy working away, when I have something in my hand like a cellphone or when I’m at someone’s house. I know how annoying the nail picking sound is so I tend not to do it when visiting someone outside my own house or when I’m with friends. Mostly. My wife has caught me a few times picking my nails while we’re away from home and in front of others so this isn’t 100% accurate.
If you can identify times, places and events when you definitely don’t bite your nails, it’s possible you can increase the amount of time you don’t do it. You may convince yourself that nail biting is really not something you need to do anymore. And you’ll become more aware of the few(er) times when you are biting them and focus on stopping it during those times.
Do you strictly bite them or pick them too?
Do you only bite your nails or do you pick them with the other hand as well? I do both but I pick more than bite. Identifying your nail biting habit(s) can help to focus on stopping it completely. For me I’ve avoided using a bitter nail polish to stop nail biting because I mostly pick my nails, rather than biting them. For you, it might be something to consider if biting your nails is the real problem.
Do you bite nails on both hands or just one?
This is an interesting one because I generally bite and pick nails on both hands but I’ve always done it moreso on the right hand than the left. My left hand nails actually look relatively normal, most of the time. It’s rare that I bite my nails so short on my left hand that it hurts but I do sometimes bite nails on my right hand down so much that it does hurt for a day or so.
Today as I’m typing this my left hand looks pretty decent in terms of nail length whereas my right hand nails are pretty short. I’ve always done this for as long as I can remember. I’m generally right-handed.
Do you bite all your fingers or just some?
As mentioned above, I tend to bite my right hand nails more than the left hand. And I tend to bite my right thumb, right index and right pinky finger the worst. I have no idea why but I just do. If one of the fingers on either hand hurts because I bit the nail too short, it’s probably the right hand pinky or index finger more often than not.
Have you ever quit biting your nails in the past?
How many times have you quit biting your fingers for at least a few weeks or longer, only to start doing it again? Did you go cold turkey or did you stop biting a few fingers on one hand and then eventually stop biting all nails on both hands completely, only to start biting your fingers again and going back to square one?
I have a few times in my life stopped biting nails on both hands for whatever reason, and thought “Ok, I got this sorted out!” only to start biting them again, for whatever reason. The only distinct time in my life I remember not biting my nails for several weeks was when I was 10. My mum paid me $10 to stop biting my nails which I did. For a few weeks. Then I started biting my nails again, couldn’t stop and refunded my mum the $10.
Do you have anyone in your life who hates your nail biting?
For me, it’s my wife and my younger daughter. If I had $1 for every time my wife has said “Stop doing the nails!” or when my little one has said “Dad! Nails!” I’d have a lot more money than I do now. My mum still notices I do it but it’s really my wife and younger daughter who notice the most.
If you have someone in your life who really hates when you do it, you might enlist their list to stop the nail biting. Even if it’s just having them pull your hand out of your mouth every time they see if happen or hold your hand when you start picking at them, it may be what you need to not only identify how often you do it, but to stop it too.
Do you bite your nails so much that it hurts?
Pain can be a good reason to change a habit. Or so you’d think. How many times have bitten your nail(s) down sooooo much, that it hurt? Or your finger bled from picking the skin? Gross, right? But we still do it. I have several fingers on both hands that I fairly regularly bite or pick so much, that they often hurt for a day or so. I don’t keep biting them until they’re better, but of course I still bite them once they start growing back again.
For me, I don’t bite my nails so much that they hurt, in general terms. It doesn’t happen very often. If you hate the pain like I do, remind yourself of how much you hate that feeling before biting your nails. It may help to slow down the frequency of nail biting, to start with.
Do you wash your hands before biting your nails?
I’m generally a clean person which is why biting my nails is such a gross thing for me to do. I shower twice a day! I change my clothes every day. I shave every day. I always wash my hands after using the bathroom and I know there are many men and women who don’t! But for some reason the thought of putting a finger in my mouth and biting a nail is something I do without concern.
And it’s not like I run to the bathroom to wash my hands before biting them. I just do it! I am more of a nail picker than biter, but I do bite my nails too.
Think about how important cleanliness is to you. Think about what you’ve touched each day – and keep covid in mind, too – and you might find that this reason alone stops you from biting your nails.
Do you think it’s gross when others bite their nails?
I do. I think it’s gross and impolite. And yet I keep doing it myself. Because I know that I’m a clean person and wash my hands multiple times each day. I can’t say the same about others. But when I see someone I don’t know putting their finger in their mouth, biting their nail and either spitting it on the ground or pulling it off and throwing it on the ground, I think “THAT’S SO GROSS!” Even though I do pretty much the same thing…
Think about when others do it and remind yourself that you’re no better than them. In some respects we’re worse because we actually acknowledge that it’s gross and we should know better.
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